Audi E-Bike Wörthersee

Let me start off by saying I hate bikers. Now more than ever this new bicyclist fad is second only to mother-in-laws in the things that have terrorized my life the most. What’s the average speed limit on a residential street, 30 mph? Well bikers seem to think it’s 5. Their bicycles are classified as road vehicles but if a car were to go 5 mph on a road of any sort they’d be cut off and would hear some unpleasant things from all the drivers who were driving behind them. It’d cause too much chaos to try to stop these bikers from continuing their life-long (aka this year’s) passion, so the only way to stop traffic congestion is to make them faster.

The Audi E-Bike Wörthersee ($TBA) is a bicycle protype powered by an electric motor that reaches speeds of up to 50 mph! Or if you’re lazy like a number of the bicyclists pretending to exercise out there, the bike cruises at 31 mph in pure electric mode. Even more convenient is the on-board computer that links to your smartphone to enable music, GPS and other features. Bikers lucked out with its LED light strips, now I have to pocket my go-to excuse whenever I purposely run over one, “I didn’t see him, it was dark!”