Gerard Depardieu “thespian actually thes peein’”

Personally, I’d never heard of this award-winning French actor, primarily because the only three letters I know are U, S and A. But now it seems Gerard Depardieu is on my mind whenever I go to the bathroom…in a totally heterosexual way. It’s no longer “think of running water”, it’s “what would GD do?”

If you haven’t heard, golden globe winner Gerard Depardieu was on a flight last month when he asked the flight attendant to use the bathroom. It was minutes before takeoff so she had to deny him the chance to drain his dragon. At this, Gerard stood up, pulled down his pants and proceeded to “spend a penny” (which has to be the oddest euphemism for urinating I’ve ever heard). He just could not contain himself. Much like I couldn’t contain myself after viewing his 1990s hit “Green Card” yesterday. It serenades you with joy and happiness only to leave you with despair and heartbreak, the man should be imprisoned. Now after weeks of ridicule and the occasional hysterical pre-teen girly laughs of Anderson Cooper, Gerard has made a parody mocking the entire event. Though not as romantically scripted, it still leaves you with the same blank face and stare of confusion as “Green Card” (partly because it is in French).